Additional Math = Head Crack

This evening while I was happily browsing through the webpage in the internet my brother came over, with a very inquiring and befuddled face showing a question in his additional math (calculus) workbook. He did not ask or say anything but just passed me the workbook and a pencil for me to work with. After insisting a piece of paper, I start pondering on it. It has been years since I do anything that have to do with calculus and believe me in secondary school, it is considered as a blessing if i could get anything other than F9 for it. Its always either P8 or F9 - my marks usually depend on the work out that I filled in the paper, and not on the accuracy of the answer. It always went wrong in the middle of it. I only get A1 once in it when the syllabus is still basic and that just it. It landslided to F9 afterwards, due to the burn out and well.... I have to admit I was a bit lazy. Modern math was easy but add math..... just gives me the creeps. An just laughed and said that he could see my face has a big bubble above my head showing a question mark and looking at the question with an expression equivalent to saying, WTF?

Anyway, like I said, its been a long time since I do calculus so I had to take a few minutes before starting it and stare at it good. It is a wonder that I still know how to do it. I got stuck at the quadratic and pass the paper back at him because I know he could go from there. But then again it gives him the right answer. Even if it does..... I don't think that I could go through it again, hahahaha. Add math sucks BIG time.

To My Sister

Happy 31st birthday Kak Wa!
May you be blessed by the Almighty
Have a great life up ahead



ps: You've been wearing his ring for so long now, when is the 'time'?

Cerita Cinta Agung

After waiting for a very long time since Puteri Gunung Ledang (Princess of Mount Ophir) was out at the cinema on the National Day (August 31st), I finally get a chance to see it yesterday. It is one of the most publicized Malaysian movie and by not seeing it, it means that I would miss the greatest Malaysian love story ever told on screen.

My first lay out plan for the day with my brother A'an was proven not effective - thanks to the bus that he took from home and thanks to MegaPavillion JB for not screening it anymore. Even if I don't like going to Golden Screen Cinema Leisure Mall, what can I say, that is the only place we have that is still showing Puteri Gunung Ledang. I manage to get off work very early, due to some business to do about my company foreign workers at Fomema and Immigration. But still it sucked big time when I have to wait on An for more than an hour from 4.30 to 6.30. And what makes things worse, my mom's cellphone at him was out of order so I couldn't keep track of his whereabouts. The show at Leisure Mall was at 6.25 and 9.10 but since the delay by the bus, we caught up with the 9.10 show.

The movie was proven worth the obstacles that i've gone through. The cinamatography was great, the editing was good and the script was so lovely that honestly, made me cry at certain part. Two big Malay legendary figure were brought together in this movie - Hang Tuah, the greatest admiral in Malacca History and Gusti Puteri Retno Dumillah a.k.a Puteri Gunung Ledang the princess from Majapahit, two lovers torn because of responsibility to their countries and their own feelings for each other.

My favourite part would be when both of them met up together at the waterfalls of Gunung Ledang after their last meeting in Majapahit (good camera technique at this part that it makes me feel what the characters were feeling at that time, very poignant... makes me think of Jeff so much). But the purpose of Tuah meeting her up was not that all good. It was for the Sultan's behalf for her hand in marriage which Gusti Puteri refused very wisely, by giving the Sultan outrageous conditions and one of them being the crown prince's blood. But in the end, Tuah and Gusti Puteri did not get together because of the curse that the Sultan put upon Gusti Puteri to live in seclusion at Gunung Ledang and no one is to be allowed to see her for the price of her request to remain at Gunung Ledang and for refusing the marriage.

Anyway, I must say and agree to my brother Bangbil that M. Nasir is the greatest Hang Tuah yet by he way he said the words and the silat moves that he do. Overall, I would say this film is more or less like the Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon but unlike CTHD, I did not fall asleep watching Puteri Gunung Ledang. Maybe because of the script or maybe because of good editing. With PGL, I know this year we would have a movie worthy enough for the International Film Festival.

Layar berbelok-belok,
Sawah dibongkar di tempat tenang,
Yang tinggal hati tak elok,
Yang pergi hati tak tenang,

Bila sampai waktu, kita akan bersama.

-Hang Tuah-
As quoted from Puteri Gunung Ledang

Where Did the 20 kg Gone?

I have been wanting to write about this in my blog about ... well not to be so 'sangka' of myself or 'perasan', its just a story that I guess worth to tell. About how I lost 2o kilos and look the way I am today. Actually weight issue has never been a problem to me and its also because of the gene factor. Most of my cousins on my mom's side are big. I was quite active in sports at school - played volleyball and handball for school so there was no problem with my stamina. But then again, nothing in life is that perfect. It was hard to get clothes my size when basically everything beautiful on the rack was made for medium framed girls, and not big girls like me. At one point in secondary school I was kind of depressed because of that. There was no taunting whatsoever - that comes in college, though I'm very sure that many girls feels like I do when the big word of INSECURITY comes into the picture.
Surprisingly enough when I was in Form 4 I resorted to throwing up all I ate. I became bulimic for a few months until one of my friends found out. She manage to get every girls in the my class to guard me up everytime i went to the restroom after mealtime to stop whatever I was doing. I couldn't thank her enough for that - Thanks Roy. As time passed by it was getting really annoying. I have stopped throwing up but they still wait up on me - I haven't had a peaceful moment doing what I want to do. One of my friends gave me an article about bulimia nervosa and I was glad I'm out of the danger. SPM was still far but I really want my brain to be functional as well as my whole body. I couldn't risk having a bad health when the handball season was drawing near. Starting from that incident, all I care about was my studies and of course my confidence level. 'Beauty is in the eye of beholder' becomes my mantra (though Dayah/Ninie said in her blog few day back that she thought the phrase was all bull, but heck this is me)
In Pre-U, the bug bites back but it was on a low level. I was not that serious about it. Since I know the danger of the 2 nervosas - Bulimia and Anorexia I didn't fall back to that. Herbal laxative comes into the picture and boy, it was such a suffering that I stopped after the first month. I can't actually go to the restroom all the time.
In degree years, being a design student was hard especially for those who does not have any art and design background. I ran away from science stream because of my bad brush with chemistry (long story there) and thought this course might be easier and enjoyable. I was wrong on the easy part but I was right on the enjoyable. Being surrounded with classmate that consist 70% males, I had to find my own niche and make my own stand. I did, but then again when sometimes the guys were talking about some girls with bad attitude I would be carried into the conversation. Just my name though, and they would say something like - she's not even pretty, even Diah is prettier. That stung but I did not do anything about it.
I only want to graduate, get my degree and the rest doesn't matter. Because of that drive I focused too much on my project - less sleep, less appetite, don't feel like having fun and everything that comes with it. I barely had time to sleep much less to eat so I only ate what is convenient at that time - cut fruits, could be brought anywhere and eaten basically everywhere. When I happen to buy decent food, the appetite was just not there and at some time I was the class favourite mealtime buddy. I ate a little and the rest of my friends would finish it off. A good friend of mine Mahathir Muhammad (yes, that is his name we always kid him around being the PM) pointed that if I really want to lose weight go ahead and take 'Sendayu Tinggi' - one of the leading name in herbal weight lost supplement. But then he said, "You don't have to, I don't want to oogle at you when you lose it". Sounds like a dare to me.
I took it starting from March 2004 and I was 78kg (about 170 in pounds) and it works. It is kind of good when meeting up with friends after a long time, especially during graduation. I so love the look on everyone's face - only for that time and it was priceless. Same goes when there were family gatherings - the first one after a long time they did not see me was on my cousin's wedding. It was good. Its been 6 months and now I would say that I'm happy with what I have now - only because its easier to buy new clothes (gosh! this really sound like a testimony for sendayu tinggi). Though there is a problem. I have to get a whole new wardrobe.

any difference?

Birthday Wishes

Today marks off my 23rd birthday. I am very grateful to the Almighty that life has been good with its normal ups and downs. Come to think of it 23 years on earth is not that long - even at some certain point we would wonder why the time goes so slow, why it is not 5.30pm yet or why the weekends comes around so slow and ends so fast. I am very sure that time goes by really fast when you spent it with your loved ones, friends, when you are doing anything that holds your interest and of course it comes like a flash when you are having a deadline tomorrow and you have been seriously procrastinating (sounds awfully familiar). As I look back for 23 years I have done so many things, the good, the bad, the stupid and I would say that some of them are interesting and I wouldn't want to trade those for any riches in the world.
For my 23rd birthday, these are my wishes:-

1. Live a happy life with my loved ones - I guess everyone would want this and not just me.
2. Have my own family - Okay don't roll your eyes on this one. I am being realistic and I do want a family of my own. With ...... okay i've been accused and being commented on gushing too much about him here, so you know who that person is *wink.
   
3. Be my own Boss - learn more about landscape business and set out on my own in a few years time.
4. Live the lessons of 5 balls - Oy! no dirty thoughts. Refer to my entry July 11th 2004 Lessons in Life.

So that is basically what I wish for on my birthday - other than the small small material thingy. Will there be a next birthday? I really hope so and for many more years to come.

Cake cutting procession - interfered by Roy

Cake, partially gone *burp ... ooops

Akustatik

Currently my blog is in static, all quiet (I can hear the pin drop) and of course, i haven't had that much time to write. That figures as my life is basically circulating on my relationship, my work and my bedroom (don't get any wrong idea, its only for sleeping and reading and slacking off and ... you get the idea). Work is still hectic and there's another presentation to chase for this Monday. Though I sometimes surprise myself. Its when the time is hectic i get to do a lot. One thing I get my work done, I always have time to chat with Jeff.As the picture up there shows, that is the doodling we did on one hectic morning, when both bosses are around *wink. Of course my doodling looks fine because i use optical mouse, easy to maneuver.
Other than that I, always manage to drop by Jusco even for a small package of sushi and of course cakes. Speaking of cakes, I don't know how but I manage to call up all my girl friends who lives around Johor. Well okay, maybe I exaggerate a bit. Not all, but most of my good friends in boarding school - prefects and rulebreakers join together. For my birthday that is, which is tomorrow.
Honestly I haven't had that much opportunity to celebrate birthday with friends for years. For one time, there's the exam week. I don't know why but nearly all the time i'm in college my birthday falls on exam week and what's worse, i have to take a paper on that very day. And then there was the September 11th event. Lets just say, when it comes to my birthday, seems like its better if they would just leave it alone. But as for this time, I want to get to see my friends. I remember them doing a surprise party at the dormitory when we were staying back for SPM. Well they were a day early but its okay.
When I was in school, my cousin Dayah and I who were both in different school exchanged super ridiculous handmade card that we made for each other, putting images of cartoons - mostly of Dragon Ball and ahem, Mizuno Ami a.k.a Sailor Mars from Sailor Moon cartoon (that was Dayah's/Ninie's favourite character in school). One thing that we always kid about our birthdays is that my birthdate is similar as my great granddad Sono's date of death while the same thing goes for Dayah only that she shares the date with our granddad's Abdon. Sounds ironic.
Before i get too caught up with my words, I'd better stop it here. Work is still waiting and I don't want to have to work tomorrow - on my birthday. Besides, my baby is now online, hahahaha.

Blink Blink Blink

The situation at work have been so hectic since last week that any extra time that i could take by just breathing makes out a difference by a few seconds. There were too many claims paperwork to do and 2 tender form to fill out that by the end of the day, my eyes gets all fuzzy because too many figures that I have to work through the whole day. But it was not that bad though. No matter how busy I get, Jeff would be online giving out good cheering by just being there and by just looking at him through the webcam. Seeing him there is just like an energy boost whenever I feel tired. Though I have to be sneaky turning the messenger on during work, even when its my lunchtime. Kind of like a guilt conscience even when my work is all done for that period of time. Besides, good brain needs good rest for a few moment or an hour.

Work today is not any different from the day before and I might say that it is still hectic because of the deadline that we have to meet tomorrow. My office is seriously understaffed (with only myself in the office, not including 2 bosses) but so far we manage to cope with all the rush and deadlines. I was drained out by the time office hour end and there I went, into my car and head home. The feeling evaporated when I reached Ulu Choh when some fellow driver on the opposite site gave out the warning blink frm the car. If there was only one car doing the blink, I might just ignore it but then again nearly all the cars that went by gave it out. I was a little bit panicky because of the unworn seatbelt. I'm already tired and I don't plan to get in trouble at the end of the day. A few miles later, there were traffic police doing the routine road block checking off for errant drivers with no seat belt, expired road tax and of course those who exceed the speed limits. I would say that those friendly warning blinks from the road user toward Johor Bahru this evening makes my day. Without them, I would probably be stewing right now over a traffic summon for speed and seatbelt. Thank you who ever you are.

Serdang and Pontian

Its been about 5 months since I left Serdang after school ends and I sure miss it a lot. There's so many things that Serdang has that Pontian doesn't and even the city of Johor Bahru doesn't have. Some may disagree but if anyone ask me where is the best place to live in, I would say Serdang - minus the constant flooding at the main road in Seri Serdang and Taman Seri Andalas.
I miss the convenience that could be found there and of course I miss MINES Shopping Fair. Its a lot of things in one - the cinema, the bowling alley, the supermarket, the clothes shop, the shoes, all of it. The cinema in MINES makes me often visit there watching any movies that I like, whether its alone or with friends. There's also a record shop in there that sells album at a very low price, and its not Speedy or Music Valley.
I miss the mamak restaurant behind the mosque that sells the most wonderful Roti Tampal in the world (not exaggerating here). Its crispy, its tasty and the dhal sambal gravy is just the right taste - not so thick and not so watery. My friends and I usually go there before class starts or when we played hooky and skip class ;) The best nasi lemak, it would be at Maulana Food court behind Sekolah Menengah Seri Serdang. The best I've ever come across.
If anyone ask me which burger among all burgers in the world do i like most, I would have to say its the burger 'tepi jalan' sold at Burger Street Seri Serdang. Its actually a back alley behind the food court or which all of us in UPM normally call it 'Padang' where the municipality put all the burger stalls at. I miss the fattening beef patty (there's also chicken, fish and prawn but i love beef the best on burgers), the overflowing mayo, the cheese, the finely cut onion, the cucumber, the tomato...... all of it. Talking about it makes me miss it even more. My favourite stall would be the first one from the road near to the former Bumiputera Commerce building, managed by a team of father and son. Their burgers sure could beat up McDonalds and Burger King anytime and of course its much cheaper than the latter. RM2.30 (for daging cheese) vs RM4++, i would say burger street ROCKS!!!
Wow seems to me that I miss Serdang because of the food and Mines... yeah guess so. Thats one of the thing that any place couldn't rival. I miss Serdang and I miss my friends who are living and working there.

Poem For Jeff

Have I told you today
How much you mean to me?
How my heart beats
When I see your face?
How I long to hold you day and night
And never want to let go?
How I long to be by your side
Through our lives
Til forever?
How I yearn to touch your face
And whisper to your ear
That I love you so
That you are my world
That you are my everything

Have I told you today
How lucky I am to love you
And be loved by you?
I could be difficult
I could be meanie
I could be overprotective
I could be lazy
But you love me all the same

Have I told you today
How much I love you?
I love you so much baby
You are my love
You are my world
You are my everything

Composed by Diah

Tuesday morning August 24th 2004

Office